are you missing out

Are you missing out?

Time and time again I have conversations with members about the profiles we’ve sent them and how many other members they’ve been in touch with.

It’s very very rare that a member tells us they they’ve been in touch with more than ten people (and that’d be a high number for them!- and a very low one to us!) even if we’ve sent them hundreds of profiles.

My dear people, you are MISSING OUT.

So you look at someone’s profile and decide he or she is not what you are looking for; or they don’t share your interests; or they don’t look attractive to you…. or whatever.

Now you may be right but you may be WRONG – and you won’t know this until you have had, at the very least, one conversation with them or had some communication between you.

Your background, your experience of life, your preconceived idea’s of life are completely shaping your judgement of this other person and how you see them, taken from their profile. But they might be (and probably are) quite different. You just don’t’ know until you contact them.

And furthermore here’s another very important thing. Suppose I let you generalise (which I never will by the way) and agree that since you can’t stand motorbikes, or gardening (or whatever your thing is) then all men (or women) who are into motorbikes or gardening aren’t going to be compatible with you.

Well, what about the one exception to the rule – and there ALWAYS is an exception. He’s the one man (or woman) who loves motorbikes (that you hate) but who is completely different to any other motorbike loving man/woman on the planet. You’ve generalised him/her out of your contact and therefore missed him/her.

I wouldn’t be so passionate about this subject if I hadn’t seen it play out amongst our own members (just read the story of Stephanie and James on our website) or in my own life. Stephanie had taken one look at James’s profile and for all sorts of reasons (looks, profession, interests, location amongst others) had dismissed James. However somehow James persuaded her to meet him….. and the rest is history.

Stephanie is a very lucky lady – as I suspect she came very close to missing James and still being single.

There couldn’t be anyone within your set of profiles we’ve sent you that you’ve overlooked could there? What a shame that would be…….