Meet a Single Christian Woman
I’m always surprised when Christian men tell me that they find it hard to meet eligible single women, because personally I know lots of single Christian women and all my Christian friends do too. Moreover all the Christian women I have ever spoken to also know lots of single Christian women. However ask them if they know any single Christian men and you get a very different answer. They don’t! Very few Christian women know of single eligible Christian men. Single Christian men seem hard to find whereas there are lots of eligible single Christian women around.
So if you’re a Christian man who wants to meet Christian women you’re in a really good place (and a much better place than Christian women). This might come as a surprise to you – especially if you’ve been on your own for a while – but it’s true! Here at friends1st we’ve pretty much always had more women on our books than men and I suspect most other Christian dating agencies are the same.
Now that news should give you in a very positive outlook for going forward to meet Christian women because you now know that you’re in a favourable position. For example, given how most single Christian women experience of lack of single Christian men in their lives, if you approach a single Christian woman and ask her out for a coffee or date, you are most likely to get a very positive response. That’s because she probably hasn’t received many invitations like that and will most likely be very pleased to be asked.
OK you say but I’ve got to meet some single Christian women to be able to ask them out. And how do I get to meet them? Let me tell you how.
Firstly you need to be purposeful about trying to meet single Christian women. Just hoping you are going to meet single Christian women by chance is a poor strategy and in most cases will not lead to success. You probably wouldn’t be reading this article if that strategy had worked.
Being purposeful means that you do things that enable you to meet single Christian women and put yourself into positions where you can meet them. It may involve a change in the way you lead your life currently or a change to the way you spend your time/money. But if you’re serious about wanting to meet single Christian women – and particularly if you’re looking for a partner – then this is what you have to do.
Like the Parthenon that was held up by many pillars, your strategy to meet single Christian women needs to include many ‘pillars’. At the end of the day you never know how you are going to meet Miss Right. It’s always tempting to ask married couples how they met – as if the way they met will be the way you might meet someone too. And so it might – but it also might not. You need to give yourself lots of different opportunities to meet single Christian women – so when you’ve gone through the list below, don’t be tempted to just choose one method – try and implement as many of them as you can.
The Parthenon still stands because of the
many pillars which holds it up
1. Large churches
Large churches always have a congregation of people of different ages, in different life stages, and of different marital status’. Invariably there’ll be a group of single women within these churches – although of course it won’t always be obvious who they are! Most big towns will have at least one if not two sizeable churches and it would be worth attending them to meet other singles. Perhaps the larger churches aren’t of the same denomination as you – worry about that less at this point – remember you are going there specifically to meet women – and you never know, you may learn something about your faith from a different expression of it along the way.
If you are already involved in your own church, that’s fine – no need to ‘move’ churches as such – but you could attend the bigger church once a month say.
Just turning up once and surveying the congregation and chatting to people afterwards at coffee – is unlikely to lead you meet that many people (half of whom might not be there that week/service anyway) – and certainly not necessary the single ones. Getting to know who’s who in a church takes time – which is why you have to attend regularly and consistently. Even that though, isn’t necessarily going to deliver the results you want.
The most effective strategy would be to get involved in one of the church’s activities. Do that and you’ll soon know who’s who and how many singles women belong to that church. This is not a short term strategy but it is an effective way to meet single Christian women.
2. Spring/summer events/festivals
A huge number of Christian organisations run large events during the spring and summer. Attendance by single Christian women is high. You’ve probably heard of some of them – like Soul Survivor, Greenbelt, Spring Harvest, Big Church Day Out to name just a few. These events are a great way to meet single Christian women – but again you’ll be lucky if you just turn up and hope you’ll meet them.
Far better would be to get involved. For example you could offer to volunteer in some shape or form. For example Meet and Greet, Leafleting, Serving tea’s and coffee’s – the list is endless. Doing thing like this gives you a much greater chance and opportunity to meet and connect with those single Christian women that you want to meet.
Google summer Christian festivals and you’ll find lots of results. Contact the organisers and express a wish to get involved, or ask how you can volunteer to help at the event. If you are given a choice of things to get involved in, make sure you select roles that are going to give you the most chance to meet and interact with others.
3. Christian social events/holidays/retreats
A good number of events and holidays are targeted specifically at Christians and regularly going on these will lead you to encounter other single Christians. Again, google Christian events in your area or further afield and chances are you’ll find something happening that you can attend.
Find your local Christian bookshop and you’ll probably find a notice board with details of local events/activities. Even if an event is not specifically aimed at Christians, remember that if it’s been promoted through a Christian shop, then it’s likely that lots of Christian women will be attending.
There are a number of Christian holiday companies and you can contact them to see what holidays they are running and for which types/groups of people or for which activities. Determine to go on one of these holidays/weekends a year. You can also get hold of publications like the Christian holiday handbook and The Retreat Guide for idea’s and other companies to contact.
4. Introduction agencies/dating agencies – off line and on line
A guaranteed way to meet single Christian women who you can be sure are also actively looking to meet other singles like you is by joining an introduction agency/dating agency. Of course, like the rest of life, not everyone you meet through this means will necessary be your ‘cup of tea’. Perseverance is necessary with this method of meeting people, but this is a great way to meet people, as it’s doesn’t involve much work and you don’t have to go ‘looking’ as such.
However choose the organisation you join very carefully and particularly if you’re going to sign up to an online agency. Many dating websites look and purport to be Christian and yet are far from it. Sometimes it’s hard to find out about the other members you might meet but it’s worth doing this before you spend your hard earned cash. The best way of doing this is making sure you can talk to staff of the organisation. Ask them lots of questions about the members and only join if you feel you’re going to get the right opportunities to meet the type of people you’re looking for.
5. Advertise
Personals in local or national newspapers are a long standing way of meeting other people and if you choose the right paper it would be a good way to meet single Christian women. It might seem a very strange thing to do, or you might perceive it as something only done by weird people or people looking for something unpalatable to you. But in fact although yes some adverts do look strange, there are also plenty of decent normal people using this method.
You’ll need to choose your paper carefully for the readership that suits you; and think carefully about the words you use, but get these two right and you may find a rich source of respondees from whom you may make some good new friends.
Obviously looking through personal ads to respond to adverts other people have placed is also worth going. Use your common sense to stay safe when contacting or arranging to meet people who you connect with this in this way.
6. Christian exhibitions
Have you heard of the Christian Resource Exhibition? If not it’s an exhibition held in different parts of the country to help Christian businesses and church organisations connect with each other. 1000s of people attend it to wander round the stalls and attend speaking events. Again a great opportunity to meet other Christians and although you could get involved by volunteering to help, it’s quite easy to meet a lot of people just by walking around and talking to stall holders.
7. Get help from friends and family
Your friends and family are the greatest asset you have if you are looking to meet single Christian women for a long term relationship. They can help you by introducing you to their friends and acquaintances and if your friends are Christians, then there’s an extremely high chance they will know of single Christian women.
However, chances are this isn’t going to happen by chance and if it’s not happened already there’s a good reason why not. There’s quite a strong possibility that your family and friends think you are quite happy in your current state – perhaps you’ve given them this impression – and if that’s the case, then you won’t be the first person they think of when they meet someone else who is single.
So you are going to have to be determined and precise about enlisting your friends and families support.
You have to enlist this support formally. You can do this either face to face, or by writing a letter, asking for their help – asking them to think carefully about their network of friends and acquaintances who are either single themselves or know someone who is single.
Plumb your friends contacts and you’ll be amazed at how almost everyone knows someone who is single. They probably won’t think of them straight away but if they think hard and carefully (without prejudging who might be right for you) chances are they will know someone.
You might find this idea hard to come to terms with. It is alien to our culture – but if you think of the relatively new concept ‘Linked In’ – it’s doing exactly the same thing for professionals wanting to connect with each other and use each others contacts.
Your own social circle is limited to your own social circle. But if you incorporate the contacts, friends and acquaintances of your circle, you’ll be amazed at how large your network of people will become.