The A to Z of Christian DatingA is for Attitude

Your ATTITUDE will affect your success at dating. Like so many parts of life, your attitude towards it will affect not only your experience of dating, but also how you get on and ultimately the results you get.

We all know people with different attitudes to life. You can have a positive attitude or a negative attitude. If you have a positive attitude, life itself is infinitely easier because whatever life throws at you, you will cope with it positively. With a negative attitude however, life’s challenges become far greater. Dating is exactly the same.

Let’s look at a concrete example.

You go to a dating event (a meal, a blind date or perhaps a speed dating event) hoping to meet someone really nice who you’ll click with. With a positive attitude you’ll be thinking that whether you meet anyone ‘really nice and suitable’ or not, you are going to enjoy the event, enjoy getting ready, enjoy meeting everyone there and enjoy going out. With a negative attitude you may already have picked holes in the event organisation, the location, the timing or any other little detail that isn’t 100% to your liking. Now let us imagine you go to the event and don’t meet anyone suitable.

Someone with a positive attitude will put the event ‘down ‘ to good experience and correctly think that just because they didn’t meet anyone ‘right’ doesn’t mean they wasted their time. They will look forward to their next opportunity of going to another event perhaps already planning how to make it work better for them. However someone with a negative attitude will come away from the same event bemoaning the waste of their time and will probably cast all similar dating event opportunities into the ‘waste of time – don’t try again’ category.

It’s the same with dates themselves or meeting someone of the opposite sex for the first time. Your attitude towards them and the date is essential and will affect how your date goes, how you come across to the other person and how you are perceived by them.

Exercise: Assess your attitude to life in general and dating in particular at this point in time – i.e. right now. Perhaps ask your friends and family for their candid opinion.

Attitude is something you can change. If you don’t think you are as positive in your attitudes to dating as you could be, determine to change. It might take a while (and it will take work – old habits die hard) but it will be worth it and it may well make all the difference.